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MOVIE REVIEW
Valentine's Day
L.A. = Love. Actually?
Love, love, love - and legs eleven: top - Jessica
Alba and Ashton Kutcher; middle - Patrick Dempsey and Jennifer Garner and
bottom - Anne Hathaway and Topher Grace in Garry Marshall's "Valentine's Day",
which opened today in the U.S. and Canada.
Warner Brothers
By Omar P.L. Moore/PopcornReel.com
Friday, February 12, 2010
"Valentine's Day" seems less comfortable with
itself as a film than it does an occasion.
Garry Marshall directs a veritable ensemble of
familiars, stitched together by queasy editing.
The film is set in L.A. on -- of course -- February
14.
Assorted ups and downs transpire in the game of love, almost all of which are
predictable.
One could be forgiven for thinking that the film, which
opened today across the U.S. and Canada, feels like "Love Actually" but the
length of this "Valentine" is painful -- one arduous exercise in endurance and
epic emptiness.
There's a gag reel during the end credits -- and it makes us gag, not laugh.
There's a lame attempt at harkening back to one of Mr. Marshall's previous films
and when an actor speaks about one of them, exasperation can be felt from miles
away.
Mr. Marshall's film seems to titter nervously at the notion
of romance between men and between members of different races, demonstrating an
edgy disposition even in scenes of relative discretion.
These moments are often offset by many unfunny
episodes, including one that very briefly involves a hysterical man resembling
Mickey Rooney's offensive apartment super character in "Breakfast At Tiffany's".
"Valentine's Day" has more than its fair share of vapid
characters (is this Mr. Marshall's internal commentary about L.A.?) -- and
numerous turncoats.
There are certain characters who behave against
type, both for the sake of expediency and a choppy screenplay by Katherine
Fugate. Her script is filled with inane dialogue and works itself into a
lather trying to make you laugh. Almost two-dozen actors populate this
troubled landscape of a film, and not one of them gets the job done to
satisfaction, and this includes Oscar-winning actors
Jamie Foxx, Julia Roberts and Shirley MacLaine.
It's a well-known fact that women have fared poorly in
Hollywood romantic comedies of late (a decade or more).
Though the film takes place in one day, the Jessica
Alba, Jennifer Garner and Anne Hathaway characters are all introduced seemingly
either legs first, in bed, half-naked or all three.
Make no mistake, each of these women are beautiful,
attractive and smart, but their characters -- in fact, almost all the women in
the film -- are depicted as anything but smart.
And some of the men aren't exempt from the Tinseltown tomfoolery either.
As in recent films like "It's Complicated",
the silly-man frolic routine is in effect in "Valentine's Day".
Looking crazy or being nutty has been in vogue a lot, while any notion of
intelligent comedy rapidly vanishes from the viscera.
'Tis a shame.
I mean, I love comedy like the next person, but
lately too much silver screen stupidity has been paraded for sale, and alas,
Hollywood just keeps on beckoning, "come to daddy."
With: Patrick Dempsey, Topher Grace, Hector Elizondo, Kathy Bates, Emma Roberts,
Jessica Biel, Bradley Cooper, Taylor Lautner, Taylor Swift, Eric Dane, Queen
Latifah, Carter Jenkins, Cleo King, Kathleen Marshall, George Lopez, Matthew
Walker, Bryce Robinson, Christine Lakin, Erin Matthews, Calvin Jung.
"Valentine's Day" is rated PG-13 by the Motion Picture Association Of
America for some sexual material and brief partial nudity. The film's
running time is two hours and five minutes.
Read Omar's "Far-Flung Correspondent" reports for America's pre-eminent Film
Critic Roger Ebert in the Chicago Sun-Times -
here
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